I recently returned from a road trip to Sedona, AZ and back. Something about the scenery along the way got me thinking about harmony. Maybe it was the way I saw so much land that man has bent to his will mixed in with the practical realities of having to work with it. Dictionary.com defines harmony as follows:
- concord, unity, peace, amity, friendship
- agreement; accord
- a consistent, orderly, or pleasing arrangement of parts
- a pleasing combination of elements in a whole
- things intended to form a connected whole
I could wax on with old cliches about how we're all in this together, there's only one Earth, and so on, but let me bring this back to bodywork.
Harmony in Massage Therapy
I've been teaching for years now and of course I have seen many student struggles. One that is common is when students seem to hit a wall where they aren't seeing the kind of results they'd like, or they're working too hard, or their clients aren't falling asleep and raving about how wonderful their bodywork is like they do their classmates'. A common theme that I have noticed is the need for a very subtle, yet very profound, shift in their way of thinking. This is what I say...
"You need to work with the body, not on the body."
Simple, eh? For some, this idea comes naturally. Others must learn it. I don't necessarily advertise it, but I make it an objective that every student leaves my program with this concept. And for some that means that I need to teach it to them.
So what does it mean, with it not on it? It's subtle, but makes a big difference. For one, studies have shown that the intent behind your touch has a dramatic impact on the outcome (Got that from Salvo). But what is that intent?
Working ON the Body
When you work ON a person, you are coming at it with your own agenda. In a very real way it is assuming that you know what their body needs better than they do. It is attempting to inflict healing upon somebody. It is an attempt to make healing an event rather than a process. It is attempting to control the outcome in a prescribed way. It is neglectful of where the client is in their healing process. In short, it is just wrong.
Working WITH the Body
Fortunately, there is a better way. When you work WITH the body, you are a partner, a facilitator, a coach, an encourager. You become a part of the process. You assist and help rather than trying to hijack the process. It allows for adaptation and accommodation to what they want, what they need, and what they are prepared to receive. It allows for the reception of the subtle information that the client is giving you through their body. It is humble. It is harmonious.
There is an old saying that when the student is ready, the teacher appears. The teacher was really there all along, but the student wasn't ready to learn anything. Healing is much the same way - when the one who is hurt is ready, healing will happen. You can't force someone into the process, they must be ready and willing to accept it. Of course, you encourage them to push their limits, but that is what spurs positive change.
The point is that when you work WITH the body, you are working from a place of respect, not one of assumed superiority. Working WITH the body, you build trust with your client and they can begin to allow the healing process to begin in your presence and with your help. Working ON the body shuts down this process and can even reinforce defensive patterns that make the client feel even worse.
The Pain of Dis-harmony
It's a shame that not all massagers out there know this. I use the term massager because a massage therapist really should know this in my book. We've probably all had clients or potential clients tell us some horror story about a massage session where they were worked "on". Often you could equate this to being "worked over". Usually it accompanies complaints that the practitioner didn't listen, didn't care, hurt them, ignored their needs, and many other gripes that really amount to boundary issues centered around an improper intent.
The best massage comes from a place of proper intent, a sense of the sacredness of the soma (or the body-mind), a place of wisdom, and a sense of harmony.
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